Recently in Twilight Category


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Source Deviant Art

9-NOV-2010 UPDATE:

Added Under The Apple Tree to LIKE
Updated Now Reading List
Added more stories to Completed or Pulled Fics List

**IMPORTANT** Change in policy - Read THIS

Personal Note: This blog is a personal one to help me keep track of stories I have read, am reading, or want to read.  I do convert stories, but for my own personal usage to add to my *nook eReader.  I have enjoyed helping people out in the past few months and I am sorry that I will no longer be able to help you with your search.  I wish you luck and happy reading.


Similarities about the Fanfiction authors that I like:
  1. All LOVE Twilight
  2. All LOVE the lemons, smut, yaoi, slash, peen, sexy hotness
  3. Mostly all are female, but don't expect sappy happy chicklit. 
Ratings:
Love = 5 Stars
Like A Lot = 4 Stars
Like = 3 Stars
OK = 2 Stars
Eh = 1 Star

All rated stories listed in order of preference (High to Low) except "Eh".

I love animals, but...

| 3 Comments
...I am not a "Dog" Person.
::GASP::

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I can hear your collective awws, and I know you're asking me how could I not love this puppy.  Go ahead and admit that's what you're asking me. 

The thing is I LOVE this puppy and dogs.  I am an animal person who loves furry little creatures, but I wouldn't categorize myself as a "dog" lover or person.  If I see a dog walking down the street, I want to talk to it (especially if it looks friendly...same applies to the owner attached to the dog),  But, that doesn't mean I want to take the dog home with me.  And I definitely don't want the dog to bark loudly at me, jump on me, push its strong stiff body on me, and especially not lick me with its big slimy wet stinky tongue.  xP

dog tongue.jpg
-WTF??!!?-

I'm not being harsh and I have good reason for what has made this way.  Really, I do have an excuse for my appalling anti-dog behavior.  Come with me and I'll tell you why.

*Please note, these things do not apply to puppies.  They are too adorable to not love even if they do all those things I don't like, but they have puppy smell and I want to eat them up.

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Happy Birthday Meg!

Today is Meg's 26th Birthday!!
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Happy Happy Joy Joy!
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That's Ren and Stimpy for you youngins

Admission #1 - This is the third time I am writing this intro because my blog program has decided to hate me and keeps overwriting things I cannot retrieve right as I am done.  Your name is mud Movable Type.   Each time I rewrite it, it becomes a little different than the previous time.  I am sorry if this sucks...I am sure the other version may have been okay. 

I have had the privilege of knowing Meg (@MegUrbani) since Spring 2009.  We became friends over a common love of Twilight and Twilight Fanfic, but have since grown past just those two things.  Some time long ago, I was searching twitter for key words.  At the time, I wanted to know if anyone knew if Wide Awake's epilogue ever posted or if anyone else cared about it.  I found lots of people who were also talking about it, including Meg.  Admission #2 - I didn't think Meg and I would be friends because I was intimidated by her bio about being an internationally published fashion photographer.  Me, being ubershy and easily intimidated, thought there was no way she'd like me.  I was happy to find that Meg is completely down-to-earth, real, and awesome. 

My birthday was in August and Meg made me these very funny Edward/Rob pics.  I wanted to return the favor on her birthday with some kind of present.  I first had wanted to use photoshopped heads on bodies type of art (but in obviously bad ways, not manips).  However, I suck at photoshop, even in the bad way.  I decided to go with caricatures based on my manga/anime/Japanese Lolita/chibi love.  I made a picture of Meg and KStew.  Meg loves KStew and she and Mr. O like to tag team against me for ever saying anything against her (it's a fake diss mostly over her Twi blinking/stuttering thing).

Meg received her present yesterday and tweeted a picture of it.  I am so happy she liked it.

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The key to being an unhealthily obsessed Twilight fan is to know when you're being a lunatic and to be able to laugh at yourself because of it.  There is always someone more crazy than you in any fandom.  Meg & I may be ravenous fans, but we also like to joke about everyone who seems worse (to us).  And yes, we too know how lame we can be about it. 

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So I decided to see what was out there if we took ourselves too seriously and thought all things Twilight were magical and not in the least bit creepy.  Let's go...

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Follow that blog: Twankhard

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Source: Twitarded

Today while looking at tweets, someone wrote "OMG @Twankhard you've made my morning". Being the nosy person I am, I clicked on the twitter account to see what it was.  I found a blog, and I liked it.  Check out Twankhard for news about Twilight Fanfic authors/stories they say have "twanked".  "Twanking" is doing something in the fandom that kinda makes you a tool. 

I love their list for "How Do I Avoid Twanking?":

We're glad you asked.

  1. Don't be an asshole.
  2. Be funny.
  3. Laugh.
  4. Have fun.
  5. Don't take yourself so seriously.
  6. Remember that fanfiction is a hobby, not a career.
  7. Don't troll.
  8. If you troll, be really smart about it.
  9. No, really. Be really really smart about it.
  10. Don't whine about reviews on Twitter, LJ, Blogger, etc etc etc.
  11. Don't try to publish your fanfiction.
  12. Don't try to make any profit off your fanfiction.
  13. Don't insult your readers.
  14. Don't be a hypocrite. If you complain about authors bashing other stories, don't let us find you doing the same thing.
  15. Don't provoke entire known critical communities. It's funny, but come on. You're wanking. Admit it.
  16. Don't be a bigot/racist/sexist. We'll flame you so fucking hard...
  17. Don't forget that respect is gained, not given by default, and you always start out at nil.
  18. When you get called on your bullshit and you know it, laugh at yourself. Admit your shortcomings.
  19. Don't be an asshole.

Inspired by This, because we are so unoriginal.


So basically someone reports a "twank", the site investigates and blogs about authors/stories they agree have done something twank-worthy.  Current post is about The University of Edward Mason, but I see Just Wait made their site as well. 

Glad I found this site today. 

Fanfic Review - Just Wait

| 2 Comments
Just Wait banner.jpg

Just Wait

By, InstantKarmaGirl

Author Summary:
AH / AU / OOC
In a world saturated by vices, Bella is forced to move in with her father
to avoid the repercussions of her past deeds. But after she meets the socially
withdrawn adopted son of the town's doctor, will she allow herself to open up and heal?

Twilight / Rated: M / Chapters: 68 / Published: 8-21-09 / Edward & Bella / Complete

The Pieces

(epilogue posted after the story ended)

Author Summary:
This is the epilogue to Just Wait. This is for everyone who needs more closure,
except for one person who should just be ashamed of her/himself.
This is for the respectful readers who asked for it, not the one person who demanded it.
Buzz, buzz.

Twilight / Rated: M / Chapters: 1 / Published: 9-26-10 / Edward & Bella / Complete

**SPOILER ALERT**

I will be discussing details within the story, so please don't read on if you haven't read the story or do not wish to see my thoughts on the story.

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Fanfic Review - Master of the Universe

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Banner "borrowed" from 50shades.com


Master of the Universe
By, Snowqueens Icedragon

Author Summary:
Bella Swan is drafted in to interview the reclusive enigmatic Edward Cullen, multi-millionaire CEO of his company. It's an encounter that will change her life irrevocably. M AH

Twilight / Rated: M / Chapters: 87 / Published: 9-11-09 / Bella & Edward

**SPOILER ALERT**

I will be discussing details within the story, so please don't read on if you haven't read the story or do not wish to see my thoughts on the story.

Please note the story link above is from the author's blog with the unrated version.  You must be 18+ to enter her blog.  The story can also be found on Twilighted (unrated version) or an edited version on fanfic.net.

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question-mark.jpgRight as I was completing that last entry, I was given a message.  It came in the form of an author asking me not to distribute a story.  I know I just said I wouldn't stop even though people were not very nice to me always, but don't you see...I should. There are no coincidences.  Based on all the time I have had my blog and have written about a subject, these two things happened way too close together.  It's like a shining light came out and illuminated an answer to an unspoken question.

Here's the scoop about me:
  1. If I like something new, I say something about it
  2. If I continue to like it, I may mention it, but usually will just enjoy it
  3. If I start having doubts or become irritated by something, I start to question things internally
  4. If something really starts to eat at me, I will finally mention it, but will pretend it doesn't actually bother me in hopes that my self pep talk will keep me from having to change things that may create a contentious situation
  5. I can be OK pretending just as long as all signs indicate I have made the right decision
  6. BUT, the first sign I receive that makes that inner voice go "Ruh Roh" and I pull the plug completely
This is my M.O. and I have done this often in my life.  I hate conflict and try to keep everything harmonious, even if I'm not happy about it. 

So what does this mean for you?

Well, it means that I am exiting the market of fanfic peddling.  What started off as a "being nice" has become "work" and if I am making authors upset by doing it, I will respect them and stay out of this distribution business. 

I know there are plenty of people out there who can still help.  I am sorry if this disappoints anyone.  I will miss the kind words and camaraderie.  I will continue to keep up my blog and as before, it will be used for me.  Maybe by taking the "work" element out of it, I will find my way to actually start reading fanfic again and end my hiatus. 

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Mrs. Oshimbo Distribution Center - CLOSED FOR BUSINESS
ROBERT PATTINSON "BOTHERED" BY WORLD CUP

Here is the latest installment of Robert Is Bothered.  In this one, he is bothered by the World Cup.  As always, Jimmy Fallon's over the top impersonation of RPattz as Edward Cullen is hilarious, especially when he hisses like a cat.  I'm actually surprised we didn't get a Robert Is Bothered installment related to Eclipse, but maybe we will next week before the opening.

I hadn't blogged the last Robert is Bothered by the iPad because I couldn't get the embed code to work; however, I see now that I can get.  Here is that clip for your viewing pleasure:
 
ROBERT PATTINSON "BOTHERED" BY IPAD
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Source - Deedee's Fanfic Recommendations

How To Save a Life
By, Unholy.Obsession

Author Summary:
What's going on with Bella's new best friend's older brother, Edward?
What exactly happened in his past that has turned the former
golden boy into a shadow of himself?

Twilight / Rated: M / Chapters: 32 / Published: 10-19-09/Reposted: 08-18-10 / Edward & Bella

**SPOILER ALERT**

I will be discussing details within the story, so please don't read on if you haven't read the story or do not wish to see my thoughts on the story.

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Fanfic Review - Illegal Contact

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Source: Unknown

Illegal Contact
By, GreenEyedGirl17

Author Summary:
Edward Masen is a 29 year old former NFL football player,
now coaching high school football in Forks.
He leads a quiet life until he meets a woman that will change his life forever.
What's been missing from his life may be right in front of him.

Twilight / Rated: M / Chapters: 37 / Published: 8-1-09 / Edward & Bella

**SPOILER ALERT**

I will be discussing details within the story, so please don't read on if you haven't read the story or do not wish to see my thoughts on the story.

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Source: Unknown

Let Your Light Shine
By, LolaShoes

Author Summary:
The honeymoon beginning at the fade-to-black and continuing
through Edward and Bella's exploration of intimacy, communication,
and how to achieve forever together.
AU Breaking Dawn

Twilight / Rated: M / Chapters: 17 / Published: 2-2-09 / Bella & Edward

**SPOILER ALERT**

I will be discussing details within the story, so please don't read on if you haven't read the story or do not wish to see my thoughts on the story.

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Fanfic Review - Tropic of Virgo

| 1 Comment
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Source Tropic of Virgo Blog Picture

Tropic of Virgo
By,
In.a.blue.bathrobe

Author Summary:
He's a young but jaded musician writing lyrics for his band, and she's a naive, frustrated poet looking to break out of her shell; their words collide online.
What happens when they meet in high school, unaware of their literary connection?

Twilight / Rated: M / Chapters: 37 / Published: 3-4-09 / Bella & Edward

**SPOILER ALERT**

I will be discussing details within the story, so please don't read on if you haven't read the story or do not wish to see my thoughts on the story.

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Source: Starrynytex Fictionator Blog

Boy in the Red Sweater
By,
Starrynytex

Author Summary:
Laced in silence and bound by his black web of a backpack,
the new boy dressed in the faded red pullover is driving Bella insane with curiosity.
Don't judge a boy by his sweater.
AH. M for future chaps, language, dark themes

Twilight / Rated: M / Chapters: 46 / Published: 6-19-09 / Bella & Edward

**SPOILER ALERT**

I will be discussing details within the story, so please don't read on if you haven't read the story or do not wish to see my thoughts on the story.

I've decided to try to review the fanfics that I have read so my ideas on each story are not lost when I move on to the next story.  It's easy to get the details confused between each story especially when all your main characters and pairings are basically the same.  This is my second review since starting this practice.  While I'd love to do this for all the stories I have read, that probably won't happen. 

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Fanfic Review - Fourteen

| 3 Comments
Body Image Issues
Source: Post Media

FOURTEEN
By,
CrimsonMarie

Author Summary:
High school is brutal.
It's even worse when you're not a size two.
Worse than that? Having a major crush on the biggest, hottest jerk in high school.
Even worse than that? Being paired up with him for a science project.

Twilight / Rated: M / Chapters: 13 / Published: 10-29-09 / Bella & Edward

**SPOILER ALERT**

I will be discussing details within the story, so please don't read on if you haven't read the story or do not wish to see my thoughts on the story.  This the first time I have felt compelled enough to write about a specific fanfiction story I have read.  I think it cut closer to home than I was comfortable with and I needed to expand on my thoughts to purge myself of these concerns.
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THE MOST EPIC MOMENT OF LATE NIGHT TELEVISION!!

OK, maybe not THE most epic, but pretty awesome.

Robert is currently on the promotion circuit for his new film Remember Me.  He finally decided to do the late night circuit (unlike during New Moon where Kristen & Taylor did the shows).  I'm so happy he decided to do Jimmy Fallon and The Daily Show, along with every other daytime or late night show.  Those two are my favorite.  In fact, I am super jealous of my friend, @megurbani who will see Rob at The Daily Show taping today.

I think Jimmy seemed a little nervous doing his "Bothered" skit knowing that the inspiration for it was sitting in the same tree as him.  I actually think Jimmy's accent even faltered a little bit. Seeing Rob do this skit really makes me wish he'd host SNL and be the musical guest too. Crossing my fingers!

I am the laziest blogger on Earth

To Blog or Not To Blog.jpg
Source: Unknown

Seriously, I have all these ideas in my head that I think would be great, but then real life takes over and I never get to any of them to the point where if I DID actually start, I'd be so far behind I won't do it. Such a blogging conundrum.  But I really want to try to be a better, more regular, blogger.

Here are my ideas for regular segments on the blog:
  • Continue my regular entry updates for fanfics - rated, reading now, to-read, etc.
  • Restart my concert reviews (starting with The English Beat/Fishbone show I saw on Friday)
  • Start a new segment for reviewing the fanfics I have finished reading so people actually know WHY I rated them the way I did
  • Start a new segment for highlighting a song a week whether it is for the song itself, its lyrics, or because it spoke to me that week
  • Start a new segment reviewing new music I have bought
  • Restart my SYTYCD blogging when Season 7 starts in May.
Now I don't want to be one of those generic blog sites that all have the same new hipster information.  Really, I didn't start this because I wanted to become famous (although I love seeing that someone has found me).  I blog because I sometimes have thoughts in my head that I want to get out.  I like to just be honest and write about things that speak to me or my passions. 

So, let's see if I can drag myself away from reading Twilight fanfic long enough to make these aspirations come true.  =)

Organizing the fanfics - Pt 2

Twilight-drawn anime style.jpgSo I created an ongoing entry to keep all my fanfics organized, but even that seems to be becoming overdone.  I'm trying to decide how I really want to organize everything within this blog without it getting confusing for anyone to find what they're looking for.

Ideas:
-Continue as I have been
-Create duplicate entries of the same info, just updated
-Keep separate lists for the things I've read and "rated" versus what is on my To-Read list
-Write reviews for the things I just finished to coincide with the rating I have given it (but only if they are completed).

It'll probably be a work in progress until I figure it out.

Shnookie Nook

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bn-nook-ereader.jpg
We got a nook

We named it Shnookie

We are already fighting over ownership of Shnookie

Good thing we know how to share (maybe)

How will an eReader change our lives?

Hmmm, let me count the ways...
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Team Edward or Team Jacob?

| 1 Comment


Taylor Lautner hosted Saturday Night Live on 12-Dec-2009, so of course you had to expect at least one Twilight spoof.  I was pretty amused by how they made Taylor a Team Edward Twi-hard teenager.  He even kisses the image of Robert Pattinson's Edward Cullen. 

On another note, while I am Team Edward all the way, as an actor I commend Taylor.  He is seventeen years old, but a consummate professional and willing to do the things his costars (RPattz and KStew) seem unwilling to do.  He's willing to enjoy his fame, be respectful yet enthusiastic, show his affections publicly and without an ounce of embarrassment, plus he actually looks like he cares how is presented when not filming.  He is the one the directors always mention first for being such a hard worker.  Of the three stars, Taylor is only one I could see doing SNL.  I respect him more for this.

But don't think I'm switching teams any time soon.

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Robert Pattinson "Bothered" by New Moon

So it's no surprise that RPattz would be "bothered" by New Moon.  I mean, Edward was absent for over 300 pages in the book, so how can we expect Rob to not be happy to be missing for most of the movie as well.  In all seriousness though, it IS Edward's fault he is missing from so much of the book/movie.  And it was his decisions that brought another guy into his Bella's life.  This was what he wanted.  Still, that has to be bothersome.

Jimmy Fallon continues to be a comedic genius with this segment.

There's even a real web page to see all of RPattz's "Bothered" videos.


Here is Jimmy Fallon's latest installment of "Robert Pattinson is Bothered".  This time around RPattz is "bothered" by holidays, especially Halloween.  For a guy who has been made famous by playing a wizard and a vampire, you'd think he'd embrace the counter-culture of the occult a little more, considering so many people pay homage to him during Halloween. =)  Enjoy!

Robert Pattinson "Bothered" by Snickers Ad

I was on vacation and missed this one, but I have to share because it's my favorite Jimmy Fallon sketch that he regularly does (for obvious reasons).  It's good to know that RPattz and I are "botthered" by the same thing in this one.  I too hate those Snickers advertisements.  They are really dumb.

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I saw this movie for my birthday the other day and ever since I can't get it out of my head.  It's like it has planted this thought seed inside and I want to dissect it, appreciate it, contemplate it, and revisit it.  I've been trying to figure out why, but in the end it just resonated with me and has earned a spot in my favorite movies list. 

If you have NOT seen it, STOP HERE, and don't read any further because I'm going to discuss it and I don't want to give anything away.  I will strongly suggest you go watch it right now...find a theater, a showing, and don't hesitate. You will love it. 



Late Night with Jimmy Fallon brought back their Robert Pattinson "Bothered" skits with a new one where Robert is bothered by Shark Week.  Once again, I realize how much I love Jimmy Fallon.  I hope he continues doing these while Twilight is popular because they're hilarious.

See the previous Robert Pattinson "Bothered" by Harry Potter.


I don't normally post comedy sketch videos on my blog, but today I am making an exception.  Late Night with Jimmy Fallon did a Twilight vs. Harry Potter sketch last night where Jimmy played both Rob Pattinson and Daniel Radcliffe.  The result = hilarious (or Hilaricus if you're my BFF). 

With all the talk about "Is Twilight the next Harry Potter?", "Is Stephenie Meyer the next JK Rowling?", "Are the Twilight kids hotter than the HP kids?", etc., this weekend is a big deal for franchise owners.  They are all watching the numbers for fear that Twilight somehow would usurp the throne from Happy Potter.  I don't know why they can't just assume that people who like one franchise would ALSO like the other.  This isn't Trekkies vs. Star Wars were talking about.  Young girls love hot guys and for the tweens, both franchises have plenty of those.  Ultimately, I am a Twihard, but only a HP-movie lover.  I haven't read the books yet (*hangs head in shame as I think to the dusty bookshelf where all the books sit*).  I keep saying I will, but since I love the movies so much I keep feeling like I should wait until the last movie has been released, then read the books.  I don't want to start being disappointed by the movies like I was with the first Twilight movie. 

In real life, I bet Rob & Daniel could be friends.  They both could empathize with being confused with their characters in very popular franchises and both have throngs of young ladies screaming their names wherever they go.   

The Way I "Hear" Twilight

| 5 Comments
Twilight-Series-Covers-twilight-series.jpgIt's no secret to anyone who knows me well that I am a Twilight fanatic and I'm not ashamed of my illogical devotion either.  I know I am not a teenage girl falling in love for the first time, but all girls remember what it was like.  All girls fantasized about finding their perfect someone just for them.  Someone hopelessly devoted to only them who made the world spin and created a place that was theirs within the chaos of normal existence.  Someone who made them feel less awkward about themselves and saw the true person inside without judgment. It's a nice feeling to have and that's exactly what Twilight does for me.  Granted, I didn't actually find my "Edward" until I met my husband, but once you do meet that person, the book feels as if it was written by you somehow.   

My devotion started after my birthday last August when I received the books as gifts. I had been living under an oblivious rock before that.  The last book, Breaking Dawn was being released and I saw the promotional stuff at all stores.  I saw Facebook buttons about Edward kicking Angel & Spike's asses, or even Chuck Norris'.  I started paying attention to media reports about the movie still in production.  Me being a person who knows their own fascination with Vampires, I was intrigued and couldn't ignore it any longer.  I put the series on my Amazon wish list and the rest is history.  

While reading the books (multiple times) or listening to the audiobooks in the car (YES I did do all of this...don't judge me!), I would start to listen to music and find myself relating songs to feelings I'd have when I read the story.  From that came the urgent need to make a playlist.  At first it was going to be one playlist per book, but in the end it became three separate feelings that resonated throughout the series. 

~CONFLICTED~

~HEARTBREAK~

~LOVE~ 


me pic_purple hair
Hi Everyone.  I am a horrible blogger (*hangs head in shame*).  How will I ever actually switch to this web page if I never actually use it?  Actually, I haven't updated my public site, www.itsnotamonkey.com either.  Well, I have a problem.  Why update that old page when I'll then have to transfer it over to this page?  But, at the same time, why should I update this page, when it's not public yet because it's pretty boring looking? 

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